sugar. my drug of choice.

With apologies to Shakespeare...

Sugar, thy name is enemy.

Sugar is indeed my enemy.  It has been for a long time.  And I'm finally realizing what it's role is in my life.

Hello, my name is Debbie and I'm addicted to sugar.

I have struggled with my sugar intake for years.  And years.

I have always been a chocolate fanatic...

I have been known to eat jelly beans for breakfast in the spring...

 My ultimate weakness is Cadbury's Easter Creme Eggs.  Oh how I love thee...

The average American consumes almost 80 pounds of sugar each year.  80 POUNDS!  That's 8 ten pound bags.  Eight. Per Person.  Per year.  

And it doesn't help that my husband works for a major candy manufacturer.  And brings all sorts of stuff home with him.

Sugar really is my drug.  I use it to feel good.  I use it when I'm feeling down.  Sad.  Angry.  Tired.  Happy.  Excited.  Stressed.  Bored.  Whatever emotion.  I use it.

And once I have it, I want more.  It gives me a buzz, and then I want another buzz.  It feels good at that moment, but then I crash, and I want another hit.

Just like a drug. 

It turns me into another person.  When I crave it, I lose all sense of self control.  I just want more and more. I forget all the ramifications of it.  I forget the insulin problems.  I forget weight gain, heart disease, diabetes, cancer, crashing, liver damage, the shakes, poor skin.  Sugar just takes over and messes with my brain and body.

And then I feel like garbage.  Physically.  And mentally.  Guilty for giving into the drug.  Guilty for not having the control to get it out of my life.

But now, I'm taking back control.  I'm getting it out of my life.  I'm on day 2 of no sugar.  And by no sugar I mean no junk - no sugar on anything.  No candy.  No chocolate.  I know there is sugar in other stuff.  But I'm talking about added sugar.  Sugar by choice.

It's hard.  But it must be done.  I don't want the effects of this drug on my body anymore.  Or on my mind.  I can say no.  And I will.

Does this mean that I won't ever have sugar ever again?  I don't know.  That I won't ever enjoy some chocolate? I don't know.  But right now, I'm not having it in my body.

If I do have it back in my life, I will only do so if I am able to control my consumption.  But like a drug, does having a small amount mean that I will be addicted to it again?  I don't know.  I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

But for now and the foreseeable future, I'm going to be drug free.

Shreddin' It

So on my last post a  couple of weeks ago, I said see you tomorrow!  Well, obviously that didn't happen.  Thanks to a stomach bug, a flu bug and a broken wrist (only the flu bug was me.  The other two were from 2/3 of my obliging sons).  That's enough for me for the first 3 weeks of January thank you very much.

So I was on the Dr. Oz Show!

I answered an open casting call one day on a whim (are you a woman who wants to lose 25 pounds?  Well, yeah!)) and the next day found myself signing up to do a six week diet plan that would be featured on Dr. Oz.  I couldn't say much about it before the show aired because the book hadn't been released yet...but now that it is the Number 1 New York Times best seller, it's time to go public.

http://shredrevolution.com/

Essentially the plan is about diet confusion, like muscle confusion.  I ate 4 meals a day, like soups, protein shakes, chicken, salads, lasagna, even a slice of pizza or two.  And also three snacks a day - nuts, crackers and cheese, fruit, veggies and hummus.  You get the drift.  Plus I was able to have my 2 martinis a week, which is a must for me in any eating plan.  

No martinis, no diet.  No kidding.

Was it hard work?  You better believe it.  Losing weight is hard work.  There's no magic pill.  There's no magic food.  There's no magic at all.  It's hard work, discipline, and exercise.  You'll screw up...and I did plenty of times.  But I would start right back up again and get back on the plan.

And you know what?

It worked.

In six weeks, I lost 3.5 inches off my waist.  And 2 dress sizes. I worked my tail off - literally, because my running clothes started to fall down.  

And I felt awesome!  I felt the best I have ever felt in my life.  And I mean that from the bottom of my heart, in all honestly. 

I've tried plenty of diets, and have never stuck to a single one.  But this one was different.  It was real food.  Food that this busy mother runner of three could make and feel good about.

There is lots more to say about it, but I'd be here writing all day.  So I'm going to blog about it over time.  

There is also lots to say about being on the Dr. Oz Show.  There were six following the Shred Diet as part of the show, and it was not the best experience.  I'll share more about that soon too.  All I can say is that Dr. Oz lost a fan.  In a big way.

Here's my 15 seconds of fame...(the video montage starts at about 2:20, and then I answer a question just after that)  Sorry about the ads.

And for my mother runner friends, if you don't blink...in the montage when I'm standing on my treadmill in my pink shirt, you can see the best running books in the world on the shelf behind me to the left...but don't blink!!

http://www.doctoroz.com/videos/shred-diet-lose-4-inches-and-2-sizes-just-6-weeks-pt-2

I'll write more about it, because I'm starting it all over again.  Got to get rid of a few more pounds. 

And fewer pounds means a faster me, on my pink miles.

Hello 2013!

2012 turned out to be a pretty good running year!  My blogging skills have been abysmal, but I made real strides towards accomplishing my goals.  Yay!

The big things:

I lost 22 pounds!  I was aiming for 30, but I'm happy with 22.  I'm down 2 dress sizes.  How can I complain about that?

I PR'd in a Half Marathon.  I took a whopping minute off my best Half time.  Hey it's still a PR!

I PR'd BIG TIME on my marathon time!  I took 1h 6 min off my NYC Marathon 2011 time, and PR'd for a marathon by 24 minutes!  Of course I had planned to run NYC in 2012 but that didn't happen thanks to Sandy.  I ran Harrisburg PA instead.  My goal was to finish in under 5 hours, and I made it by 19 seconds.  Whew!  I wold have been crushed if I had missed that goal by just a few seconds.

Some big news of 2012 is that I was selected to be on the Dr. Oz Show (airing today, repeating tomorrow).  I followed the "Shred Revolutionary Diet" for 6 weeks, documenting my progress, and then taped the show with 5 other ladies who had done the same thing.  The diet worked just fine, but the Dr. Oz experience was really lacking.  I'll write about that tomorrow.

I just had to get those 2012 items out of the way so I feel like I can start again tomorrow with a blogging plan.

I have a great feeling about 2013 - it's going to be a great year.  For fitness and fun!

I hope you'll join me on the journey along My Pink Miles!

See you tomorrow...

Starting to Feel Human Again

4 weeks post op and I'm starting to feel a little more human again. 

 

picture from http://runningtshirtsonline.spreadshirt.com/evolution-of-woman-women-s-running-t-shirt-A6417496

Thank goodness. 

I was starting to have some trouble with my pathetic self.

My recovery from this horrible but necessary surgery has been problematic, to say the least.  I had to have another urgent trip to the doctor on Monday as my bladder hasn't been working quite right.  The doctor thinks that it is having some trouble getting accustomed to it's new internal pressure.  It's going to take some time to get used to its new and improved function.  So in the meantime, I'm on another medication and have to go back for some tests in a week and a half.  Hopefully everything will be normal.  And the medication is starting to work, relieving the pain and spasms I was having.  Again, thank goodness. 

It's been difficult not getting depressed. I'm usually so active and always training for something.  Always having a goal or a project to work on.  I set myself some goals to work on during my recovery - mostly writing related - but in all honesty I've been in such a fog the last four weeks that I haven't been able to think straight. 

And not being able to really exercise has been very hard.  Running would always clear my head.  I'd start off grumpy, angry, whatever, and come home 4 or 5 miles later refreshed and renewed.  I'm up to walking two miles a day now which is certainly helping.  But it's nothing like pounding the pavement.

But then yesterday I got some news that has put a real spring in my step!

I'm in for 2012!  As in the New York City Marathon...again!  I got in the lottery last year, and thought I'd enter again this year. 

I figured that my chances were slim to zero for this year.

But somehow, I made it in again!  I am beyond excited!  November 4th is 199 days away, but now I feel like I have a goal again.  If my first few weeks of training are just walking, well so be it, but I'm still training.

The New York City Marathon is such an incredible experience.  Running those streets last year was a day unlike any other. 

And this year, it's going to be even better.  I can feel it. 

I'm getting my body healthier. 
All my bits and pieces have been put back where they belong. 
I'm losing weight. 
I'm eating a lot more spinach.

And at last my mind and body are starting to resurface from the last four weeks of drug induced lethargy and self induced pathetic-ness.

4 more weeks of recovery restrictions and then...

Look out New York, here I come!  Again!

Crossing a different kind of finish line

I set myself some pretty tough goals at the beginning of the year.  My 30-30-30 plan. 

30 minutes of exercise every day.
30 minutes off my marathon time.
Lose 30 pounds.

It's the beginning of March, and I've made some headway. 
I've lost 6 pounds. I'm faster and stronger. I've exercised 30 minutes almost every day.

But now, I have to reevaluate, or perhaps I should say redefine, my goals.

Turns out I'm going to be having surgery on March 27th.  Yep, I'm going under the knife.  Something I wasn't expecting back in January.

It's not serious.  It's routine - but most unpleasant.  I've been suffering from multiple pelvic organ prolapse for some time, but it's been getting steadily worse over the last few months.  I think my stubborn cough has had a lot to do with it, plus I had very large babies (thanks, 10 pound Collin!), which started the whole downward progression.  Pun intended.

Anyway, the doctor will have his way with me on March 27, a short 3 weeks away.  I hear the first week of recovery can be pretty rough. 

And then I have 2 months of very restricted activity.
No lifting anything for 2 months.  Not even a gallon of milk.
No carrying a laundry basket.  That will be fun with three boys in the house and endless piles of laundry.
No vacuuming.
No carrying groceries.
And most definitely, no running. 
So needless to say, my 30 minutes of exercise won't be happening for a while.  Which means weight loss will be even harder.  And I can pretty much say goodbye to a marathon in the fall. 

I'm still running the NYC Half on March 18th, but I've had to cancel the More Magazine Half in April and the Superhero Half in May.  I was hoping to run the Wineglass Marathon in September, but that won't happen.

I'm of course disappointed that I have to let go of these races.  But I think the reason is definitely worth it!  My quality of life is going to dramatically improve. 

Running has helped me through this. 

Physically, I really believe that it has strengthened my muscles.  I'm sure my condition would be a lot worse if I didn't have the abdominal muscles that I do from running.  (The muscles are in there, I know it, but you just can't see them.  My six pack is just hiding out.) 

Mentally, running has given me strength too.  I've realized that I have incredible stores of strength.  Running up miles of hills, having a kick at the end of a 9 mile run, plus completing 2 full marathons, shows just as much emotional strength as physical strength.  I won't ever quit.  Ever.

So I'm going to look at this forced rest as a fresh start.  A fresh start with a stronger body that's had all it's bits put back into place.  I'll get through the pain of recovery.  I'll get through the frustration of not being able to do a single thing for the next 2 months.

It's like I'll be crossing a different kind of finish line. 
And then I'll head to the next race.

Confessions of a (former) Professional Chocolate Taster

Last summer I accepted what I thought would be a dream job. 

Professional Chocolate Taster at a major candy manufacturer.

As a self professed chocoholic, I thought I had died and gone to heaven.  I love chocolate.  I have always loved chocolate.  I can never get enough chocolate.  And now, to be paid to eat chocolate?  Can it get any better?

The job was great.  I met wonderful and fun people.  It was only for 6 hours a week, spread over 3 days - perfect for a re-entry into the work force with young kids at home.

I tasted amazing chocolate.  I learned about tastes, odors, and foods other than chocolate.  It was fascinating to be exposed to the intricacies of what we eat and why we eat it and what makes us want more.

But then over Christmas, I had an epiphany of sorts. (good timing for an epiphany - pardon the pun)

What was I doing to myself?  I was trying to lose weight.  Run faster.  And most importantly, come to grips with my sugar and food issues.  What on earth was I doing as a chocolate taster?

I reflected on the past few months as a taster.  I had been exceptionally tired.  Grumpy.  Moody.  Yelling at the kids a bit more than normal.  Just in an all around funk.

And then I got some routine blood test results.  Cholesterol up over 20 points.  Blood sugar up to just 4 points below pre-diabetic level.

That's when my epiphany happened. 

The sugar.  The chocolate.  They were the last thing my body - and mind - needed.  Most of the candy I tasted I spit out.  But my body was still absorbing some of it.  How can it not?  What was I doing to myself? 

I had my dream job, but at what cost? 

So last week, I said goodbye to the chocolate, goodbye to the job and goodbye my new friends. 

It's been a week, and already I feel like a different person.  I've virtually cut out added sugars from my diet.  I'm following Weight Watchers on-line.  And I've lost 3 pounds.

I wouldn't trade those few months as a Chocolate Taster for anything.  Besides being fun, it was pretty cool to tell people what I did and watch their eyes grow big and mouths water!

But sometimes what we think is perfect turns out to be anything but. 

I will never give up chocolate totally. 
There will always be room for an occasional nibble. 
But I'm going to leave it at that.

My 30-30-30 plan.

I love January 1st.  The whole starting over, resolution, new me, thing.  So I'm giving myself an overhaul.

I've been running for 2 years now.  2 whole years.  And in that time, I've run 4 5ks, 3 half marathons and 2 full marathons.  Not bad for a newbie.  But in each race I just kind of plodded along.  I focused on the finish.  Not my finish time, but crossing the finish - you know, in an upright position, smiling.  Not crawling and crying. 

So now I'm taking it up a notch.  I want to be faster.  I want to improve my training.  Be more consistent.  Change it up a little.

So I've created a plan.  I'm calling it my 30-30-30 plan. 

Forget Herman Cain's 9-9-9 plan (thankfully, most people have.)  30-30-30 is where it's at.

I've committed to doing three things.
Lose 30 pounds.
Exercise 30 minutes every day. Every day.
Take 30 minutes off my marathon time.

I have tried and tried to lose these pounds for years now.  I struggle with commitment.  I struggle with sugar.  I struggle with emotional eating.  And training for a marathon leaves you hungry beyond belief.  And to satisfy that hunger and train properly, you have to make smart food choices, which I don't always do.

I'm committed to my running, but I struggle with it.  I need to have a race to look forward to.  If I don't have something on the calendar, I will easily ignore my exercise goals and skip my running because I'm too tired, because I was up too late last night, because the kids are sick, because it's raining, because I have to clean the house, blah blah blah.  All excuses.  If I have to get up at 5am then that is what I have to do.  (And the 30 minute exercise thing a day doesn't have to be running - its 30 minutes of conscious exercise.  Briskly walking the dog on a rest day will cover it.) 

I've never done speed work.  Never done intervals.  Never done tempo runs. I've just run.  Quietly trudging along my rural New Jersey roads.  Or on the treadmill.  Time to change that up.  I'm saying hello to intervals and tempo runs.  This, combined with a slimmer me, equals a faster me.

I'm not sure which marathon I'm aiming for in the fall.  I'll take my chance again with the lottery for NYC in November.  If that doesn't happen, then I'm thinking of the Wineglass marathon at the end of September. 

That gives me at least 8 months to say goodbye to 30 pounds and 30 minutes.  And hello to a healthier me.

Today was Day 1. 
3 miles, 33 minutes.
No more excuses.